wumpusfiles (wumpusfiles) wrote,


No mystery on where this is going kiddies. If you read the last, very angry post, you got a load full of me being totally pissed with a hint of insecurity. Well I have to write today because I feel that I have made a mistake.
It takes a lot for me to admit that I was wrong on many things. Not saying that I think I'm always right, but I just need to calm the hell down and think shit out once in awhile. I just jump the gun when it comes to matters of me opening up to people. If the situation doesn't go well to my standards, then I start to freak, much like yesterday. Now I could go into the fact that communication could have come from the other party, it's a cop out, but a point. However I know how to use the phone and should of been a big boy and sucked up my pride for five minutes. Then maybe I would of realized that we just had a communication problem earlier in the evening.
Funny story, it seems that when I noticed that my date was passing through the parking lot, she did stop and get out. Then she waited outside never once poking her head into the restaurant to see if I was there. This is the exact moment when I decided to sit and wait to see if she was coming in, in turn not poking my head out to see if she was there. So we both sat around waiting thinking that we had been stood up.
After hearing the other side of the story today, I felt like a dumb ass, and still do a little. I know that it really isn't a big deal, but I am embarrassed at my actions. I need to just stop worrying so damn much when it comes to these situations. Also I need to stop being melodramatic, and think rationally before flying off the handle. This will help to keep the positive relationship going much longer, by me not sticking my foot in my mouth.
The thing is that I really like this woman, and I try too hard not to screw up, I feel that sometimes I do, and that sucks. I just don't want her to think less of me, or think that I'm pathetic. I just need to actually talk to her more often, instead of always goofing off, which can be fun, but it doesn't help to get to know her better.
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